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Oct 15, 2014    Burn Book

aggressive [uh-gres-iv]

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Aggressive. Think about that word. If someone calls you aggressive, in the context of “my boss is scared you want to offer me a job because you’re aggressive.” Hmmmm. For some reason it bothers me. I’ve been called aggressive many times in my career. First in sales, and secondly as a business owner. It never bothered me until lately, and maybe it’s because it makes me highly acute of my gender when someone calls me that. There are few things that truly piss me off in life—but a big one is when someone makes me feel aware of my gender. I don’t go out in the world as a minority-owned, woman-owned business owner. I’m just a business owner, like I was just an executive in business development. What’s the big deal?

The big deal is I like to take words that bother me, flip them upside down and let them empower me. Would a guy call another guy aggressive in that context? Here’s another example a friend told me about. Another agency owner had called her and said, “I wanted to check and see if you have any projects. I’m not aggressive like Annie is, so I want to make sure I’m following up with you adequately.”

Um, if this dude is calling me aggressive for being on top of my game, then hell yes I’m more aggressive than a starving kid needing a piece of bread. OK, bad analogy but political correctness has never truly solved a problem in my opinion. I think a guy would call another guy ambitious, or driven—but never aggressive.

I’ve sat on this long enough. Don’t make me feel like a girl, and I won’t make you feel ignorant. Deal?

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